OK, so you've all been thinking...or not... "How much longer can she go without posting about shidduchim? We've all done our share already!" Well, here it is.
Next disclaimer: This is written in the boys' favor. I am not trying to put anyone down; rather, to offer a suggestion that will be of benefit to everyone.
You may or may not have heard that there's a "Shidduch Crisis" going on. I'm not here to debate about phraseology, but to provide a small slice of solution.
I've been to places where singles gather, and noticed a certain trend. Though there were approximately equal numbers of eligible women and men within the same age range (i.e. let's not get into demographics, statistics, and math here), I couldn't see any reason why the two would be attracted to one another.
The women, for the most part, appeared well-dressed, intelligent, and sociable. Those with whom I conversed were educated, motivated professionals with active lives. The conversations were fun, stimulating, and easy.
Quite a number of the men, to put it quite bluntly, were nerdy and unappealing. (I have nothing against nerds, by the way. I consider myself to be just shy of the highest order of nerdom.) They sat or slouched around, exchanging such profound words as, "Hey, nice to see you again -- what brings you here?" and "Um." Many appeared somewhat unkempt and their clothes were out of date, or worse, uncoordinated. When they're not attending singles events, they barely move from their cubicles. Think Dilbert, personified, times 30.
Those of you who know me can attest that I'm not terribly big on fashion and small talk. But everything in this world has a place. How on earth are these two groups supposed to relate to one another?
My proposal is that every person who finds themselves unmarried at a stage of life when most of their peers are married (do we really need to debate the age cutoff?) should see a life coach. There should be committees set up in major Jewish communities to do the dirty work. Best case scenario, the coach will see that they are a normal dating candidate and put them in his/her "little black book." If not, the coach should advise the person in practical matters such as how to dress and act in social situations and how to get a life outside your office.
Many of these people would make wonderful husbands and fathers, if they could only find a wife. Honestly, which of these sophisticated, motivated, active women can these shlumps be expecting to marry?