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Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Mind Broadening (A Tutorial for the Narrow-minded)

Today was a rare holiday in Shidduchville as Bad4S discussed one of the merits of dating; namely, meeting people with varied perspectives and knowledge bases. Being that dates are often hard to come by, I've had to come up with alternate methods of mind-broadening. Here I present a cost-benefit comparison of two popular techniques, applied in various scenarios:

1. Potential mind-broadener turns out to be a jerk
Dating: Attempt to restrain tongue until jerk departs, then explain to shadchan why you don't want to go out again even though you're really not "picky."
Blogging: Close window. Alternatively, leave anonymous snarky comment and then close window. Go on with life immediately.

2. Balanced view of perspectives desired
Dating: Find datee, screen for dateworthiness, wait for mutual approval. Clear evening, dress up, do hair and makeup. Hear one perspective. Repeat until desired breadth of mind is attained.
Blogging: Post controvertial bait regarding the prospective perspectives. Wait for perspectators to comment. Alternatively, search blogs for desired topic and read fifty perspectives in one sitting.

3. Perspective needed is held by persons of differing religious affiliation
Dating: Market self to shadchan outside of known community (if applicable). Convince someone completely different than you to spare an evening entertaining you with their perspectives. Risk damage or destruction of your chances of ever again being introduced to someone actually compatible for marriage.
Blogging: See scenario #2; adapt as needed.

I'm starting to see why most of us spend more evenings blogging than dating...
And while you're out there getting broadened, do remember not to be so open-minded that your brains fall out, a severe yet oddly prevalent side-effect of many mind-broadening techniques.