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Monday, June 25, 2007

School's out!

Those most loyal and faithful readers who have been regularly peeking in to look for my next post have surely noticed my brief absence.

Since I am familiar with the angst of one who feels the compulsion to check frequently for new posts by favorite bloggers, I have decided to spare you all the guesswork and divulge some of my summer schedule.

I am not guaranteeing posts at the following times, but if I manage to get in some posting over the summer, this is when it will be up and you don't need to bother checking in any other time:
> A day or two before 9 Av
> Around August 12
> Just before Rosh Hashana

By Sukkos time, I will probably be back on a normal schedule, whatever that is...

Have a wonderful summer! I'll miss you!

Monday, June 18, 2007

The Final Exam

Technically speaking, I had all the time in the world to study.
Practically, it boiled down to about two days.

It was an extremely important test. So great, in fact, that for a while I couldn't even bear to think about it. So I didn't.
But time marched on anyway, and in the back of my mind I knew I would have to take the test regardless.

So I made up my mind and took out my notes. I also had to get everything ready. In order to ensure an optimal studying experience with minimal interruptions, I had to make sure I had something to drink and nosh handy, as well as paper and pens in case I had to write anything. I then adjusted the air conditioner, turned on some soft classical background music, and brought the cordless phone so I wouldn't have to go running for unimportant phone calls. Then I had to replenish my drink and nosh.
Almost ready.

So I finally sat down to study, skimmed a few pages, highlighted some facts to memorize later. The information was swarming before my eyes; I feared I would never understand it all.
Studying is hard work.
I needed a break.
I mean, no one is perfect. If you do nothing but study, your brain will explode. Everyone needs a break to refresh themselves now and then. I'd be right back.

Well, it took a little longer than expected. You know, one thing led to a next... but I'm back, and now it's really time to hit the books.

I breezed through a couple of chapters that I was kind of familiar with, then I came across one real stumper. I read a couple of paragraphs, but it just wasn't working.
Oh well, I guess I'll just skip Unit 4, then.
Come on, they can't really expect you to know the whole entire book, can they?

By about 5AM, I was completely exhausted. I felt like I just couldn't keep my eyes open another second! But, knowing that the final would begin in just a few hours no matter how prepared I would (or wouldn't) be, I pushed ahead and studied for all I was worth.
Don't know why I bothered. At that hour, it was taking three times as long as it should have and there were times when I was sure my eyes were fooling me...
But I just had to do whatever I could.

Because ready or not, it was time for the final.

Might sound like a cute anecdote, typical 10th-grade style. However, I urge you to think of the Final Exam which we will each face after 120 years, iy"H. Each part of this little essay corresponds to a common tactic of the yetser hara (evil inclination) who tries to distract us from our true task. What will we answer when the Examiner asks what we did when we should have been preparing? "I spent my nights blogging... some were very interesting, you know..."

Monday, June 4, 2007

Long time no see

It's been way, way too long.
I could tell you all the excuses
but you know me too intimately for that.
The truth hurts
but it's all there is.
I got busy
put you on hold
meant to come back
you know how it is...
I'm sorry
I didn't take the time to listen to you
didn't tend to your needs
figured you'd still be there
same as always
when I'd have time.
But I didn't.
And you weren't.
And I went on
without you.
I didn't mean
to drift away.
But drift I did
without you,
my best friend,
to guide me.

Then one day
sounding faraway
as if through a mist
and down a long tunnel
I heard your voice
My heart leapt
With a pang
as I realized
I barely recognize you anymore.

But now, I promise
I'm listening
We'll catch up on old times
And this time
We won't just keep in touch
because I'll never let go of you

It's been way, way too long.
Oh, Neshamale
(Dear Soul),
how I've missed you!