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Thursday, April 16, 2009

Meet Peshy: A Biography

It's time you meet the newest member of my family, Genesha Pesha Schwartz. (She's closely related to SD's old pal, Golda Perel.) My parents first invited her in thinking that she'd make a great playmate, but we soon realized that she was much too homesick for her native Kansas to be much fun. In fact, she frequently seemed to be a little disoriented, thinking we actually werestill out west. Peshy is what you'd call a real fair-weather friend. If there's a cloud in the sky, she makes a beeline back home to the range, and if it's really stormy she prefers to stay in her cozy sleeping bag. But on a sunny day she'll stick with you and help out.

Naturally, it was a rainy day when I asked Peshy to come with me to my job interview, so she was totally unhelpful, though she did offer to find me an even better opportunity in Wichita, and a home where the buffalo roam. I hear the skies are not cloudy there, either -- I can see why she misses it. We had a bit of a falling-out after it took me twice as long as planned to get to the interview, but we had a truly heartwarming reunion just yesterday, which is why she's getting her very own post to show how much I appreciate her new loyalty.

I have to say, though, it's not easy living with Peshy. She can get a little too farfrumpt sometimes. She's so machmir, she doesn't even hold by the Mapkvester Rebbe, and on Pesach she only gets her nourishment from a sterile IV line. She's so tzniyus that she always stays inside, which would be a wonderful trait if not for the fact that she always seems so pale and withdrawn when the rest of us return from our adventures. It can take a while to get her started again. But most annoying of all, she's always concerned that her friends are going off the derech. I mean, a good friend should certainly give mussar sometimes, but there's a limit. On a positive note, though, she has the patience of a saint; she'll repeat her admonitions three times, and then gently steer us back even when we've gone astray.

Another thing we have to be careful with is Peshy's insecurities. She gets insulted way too easily, so we can only talk about her in hushed, whispered code. Maybe she's just still touchy because of my treatment after the interview incident, but it sure took a lot of ego-stoking to get us back in her good graces. SD was a great help yesterday. She encouraged all to be generous with the compliments, starting us off with the one that basically sums up this post: "Peshy dear, we'd be lost without you!"

12 comments:

Peshy said...

You should have listened to my advice. The job in Wichita was way better.

And I heard what you said about me.

little sheep said...

lol

Something Different said...

I'd say she's more of a descendant than a close relative.

And you might want to note that SD was the *only* one who came up with any decent flattery for Peshy.

(Uh, sorry Pesh, I know you're reading this. I didn't mean that. You rock.)

Floating Reflections said...

:) A great laugh.

I thought that only my GPS system was temeramental (it doesn't work when it snows) glad it's not just me.

Something Different said...

Oh FR, you've gotta meet Peshy then. I'll bet your GPS (name?) would love her!

Hear that Pesh???

Floatiing Reflections said...

Never been in the habit of naming my stuff but gotta admit that that doesn't stop me talking about to them ;)

harry-er than them all said...

its not so hard to use a gps. you just can't cheap out and get the worst ones (cheapest on the market, so that they actually work.

also it pays to look at a map sometimes (the audacity!), you may actually get there...

Something Different said...

FR- we're awful that way. We name our shabbos chicken before we eat it! (My sister MP naturally doesn't approve, but that just means more for the rest of us! :-p)

David_on_the_Lake said...

ok..is peshy an alter ego?..a real person?
scratchin my head here...

Something Different said...

DOTL- click on the golda perel link and you'll understand. ;)
Some people are weird... (myself included... Hahahahaha)

halfshared said...

I still can't believe I ordered two of those "Peshys" for my family. I thought the GPS has got to be the new "must have". It sounded so intelligent and helpful the first time I used it in a rented car.
They are now collecting dust in the glove department.

The Child Inside said...

Half Shared - Maybe they make a special kind just for rental cars! We once got a rental car with one and it was great. And all-knowing.